Muraho! (Kinyarwanda for “it’s been a while”)
Posted Mar. 18th, 2007
Dear Family and Friends,
Our January Newsletter became February’s and now March’s as we’ve been so absorbed in Kinyarwanda language study and now the transition to our work at Peace House. Our hearts are filled these days with gratitude for the many blessings that we are receiving in Rwanda. There are many difficult moments, to be sure, but our overall experience has been richly rewarding thus far. This newsletter is divided into two parts: first, we wanted to share a blog reflection that Aaron posted to the website after a recent retreat. Afterwards, we share some updates that pertain more specifically to our family and daily life.
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“The Proximity of Life and Death”
I just returned from a wonderful weekend away on retreat at Centre Christus, a Jesuit retreat center only about 20 minutes from our home. It’s a relatively quite sanctuary amidst the bustling city, where cows wander around munching grass and a cacophony of birds wake you early in the morning. The liturgies are vibrant and packed with people; I arrived half an hour early and got one of the last seats. And for those who arrive late or who prefer a little extra elbowroom, an expansive old African tree spreads its limbs and blankets the benches beneath with shade, making a peaceful natural sanctuary just behind the chapel.
I was sitting under that same tree a few days before when I noticed a rather large headstone farther down the hill, surrounded by stones and flowers. Curious, I walked over and read the words with sadness but not surprise: In memory of the 17 Brothers and Sisters who were killed here on April 7, 1994. It was late in the evening of April 6th that the genocide began, meaning that Centre Christus was one of the first places the killers arrived. It is true that virtually no one was spared the horror of those dark days.
Click for a larger view.
Now, thirteen years later, it is hard to imagine the destruction that swept across Rwanda in 1994. Today, Centre Christus is like a small slice of heaven on earth—quiet and serene, peaceful and prayerful. But as I walked around, meditating on the juxtaposition of life and death in our world, I was surprised to hear the sound of metal clinking on the stones beneath my feet. Looking down, I discovered a large caliber bullet—old, rusted and with a large dent in one side. I have little doubt that it has been lying there for all these years; after all, how often do Jesuits carry machine guns? It seems quite ironic that this bullet found a new home amidst my personal keepsakes. At least for now, I am holding on to it as a reminder that the distance between life and death is sometimes much shorter than I imagine. I thank God that it ended up in my drawer, as opposed to in the body of one of the Jesuit brothers or sisters.
This year, April 6th happens to fall on Good Friday, the day Christians commemorate the crucifixion of Jesus. We have been told that April is a terribly difficult month in Rwanda, as the unwanted memories and pain come flooding back for many. And while it is somehow appropriate that the two days coincide this year, it is also hard to imagine how the Jesuits at Centre Christus will move from the memory of their brothers and sisters being murdered on the 7th to the joy of Easter Sunday on the 8th.
As these days of Lent continue, I invite you to pray with me for Rwanda. For even as we fall in love with its green hills and stunning vistas, we are reminded that the distance between life and death is never as great as we imagine, and the pain of the genocide, while somewhat buried by the earth’s cycles around the sun, remains fresh and palpable for most of our new friends here.
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Updates on the Froehlich family:
As February turned to March, we transitioned away from intensive language study to our full-time work at Urugo ‘rw Amahoro, or Friends Peace House. While we miss full-time Kinyarwanda study, it is exciting to have begun our work at Urugo. In our first two weeks we have already traveled to a 3-day trauma healing workshop, and to three other locations to participate in goat distributions for the Women in Dialogue project (which brings together women survivors and wives of prisoners in associations for mutual support and assistance).
Celeste was particularly inspired by the trauma healing workshop, and the hunger for understanding that she witnessed there. It seemed like such a relief to participants as they began to recognize and articulate the consequences of trauma in themselves and their communities. It is thought-provoking also to see how Rwandans naturally understand trauma in much more collective terms than the individualistic ways we in the US tend to think about trauma. There was an atmosphere of hope as participants shared stories not only of unthinkable pain, but of healing, forgiveness, and reconciliation.
Amidst all our travels, we have also begun work in the office, which is a challenge. Work styles and structures are so different here, and while people are looking to us to offer new skills and resources to address problems, we are also trying to come with an ‘empty cup’, as learners, and to wait for invitations. This is more challenging than we ever could have imagined, as so many difficulties seem urgent and it is very tempting to offer a characteristic North American fix-it mentality. Please pray for us that God we’ll guide us to daily empty our cup and keep love and relationships at the forefront of our presence here.
On the home front, our boys are slowly adjusting to life as school children in Rwanda- Eli more quickly than his big brother. Eli is already speaking a smattering of both French and Kinyarwanda phrases, and seems to be getting along just fine in school. David is struggling with missing friends at home, and feeling left-out because he cannot speak French with the other children, but that is finally really driving home his motivation to learn French. He now wants Celeste to speak French with him most of the time to help accelerate the process! On the other hand, David likes his teacher and understands enough to be excited about all the animals and bugs his class is now studying! At home, the kids continue to enjoy playing with neighborhood kids and taking long walks as a family through the nearby fields and forests.
We thank you for all the prayers and support so many of you have shared with us in these first months. Your emails, packages, and other activities in support of our ministry mean so much to us. In fact we have really enjoyed working over email with a couple friends in Chicago. One developed a Parish mission activity based around reflection on what it takes for a poor Rwandan family to survive (we provided info on the costs of food, shelter, water, and salaries, etc.), and another is working on a poster based on a photo that David composed. Our home parish in El Paso is also discussing with us ways to connect. We really appreciate these ideas and inspiration, because we believe an important part of our mission here is to be bridges between Rwandan and North American realities.
In that vein we wanted to mention that the Day of Remembrance, which memorializes the beginning of the genocide is coming up here in Rwanda on April 7th. We propose that some of you may choose to gather together on this day in solidarity with the Rwandan people. Perhaps you could share a solidarity meal, a film like Hotel Rwanda or Ghosts of Rwanda, or a short liturgy. Please email us for ideas, and write to us if you do have a gathering. We would love to post them on our website. By the way, if you haven’t had a chance to look at the website, you can visit it at www.thefroehlichs.org. There you can find pictures (such as the bullet from Centre Christus, or the photo that David composed), stories, audio clips and other resources. Any suggestions you have for the website are welcome as well!
Our apologies to those of you who may have missed our last newsletter. We’ve been a bit disorganized with our email list, and hopefully finally have it in order. Anyone who would prefer not to receive monthly emails, please reply with UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject line. Also, those we haven’t heard from in a while, please be in touch! We miss you and would love to communicate with each of you individually. Your emails are an important connection to home for us. Email us at mail@thefroehlichs.org.
Many blessings to all of you, and please stay in touch! Munsi umwiza (have a great day),
Aaron, Celeste, David and Eli
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